Sometimes people ask you to tell them more about yourself, more about what you are thinking and feeling and briefly you feel happy. Alas someone is willing to shoulder a little of your burden. But when the words come out, you don't feel that it is being treated as important as it should be. You revealing a part of yourself is not as precious and important as it is to you. And you realize sometimes you don't have to put in any effort. No effort whatsoever because not everyone deserve a chance. Not everyone deserve a piece of you when you don't have many pieces left.
Each time I feel disappointed, I feel angry, anger of almost equal intensity. Because I'm not a cynic, I hate to be a cynic, but I'm turning into a bitter one. And as much as I want to hold my walls, at the darkest hour I feel everything crumbling down, my defenses, my pride, my feelings.
Why. Why is it so difficult to find someone who cares?
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