You think you know what you're looking for till what you're looking for finds you

On the way back home from school and it's so late and I was starving and so stressed up from all the work I've to do when I reach home. But then I think answers find you in queer ways. My I pod played a song that leaves my feelings in the right places. 

Life can get so tiring sometimes and you wonder why you're working hard for the things in life you don't seem to want and for things you can yet understand. But ultimately I think you'll get to where you want to be with all the effort you put in along the way. Not everything in life is given to you but certain things are only given to you and happiness come from appreciating and being thankful for them. When there is no one that can tell you the right words, let faith and your beliefs bring you comfort. 

There’s no music
No confetti
Crowds don’t cheer and bells don’t ring
But you’ll know it
I can guarantee
When the right one comes along

What their thinking 
What you’re feeling
You no longer have to guess
All those questions
Finally put to rest 
When the right one comes along

Every single broken heart
Will lead you to the truth
You think you know what your looking for
Til what you’re looking for finds you

In a cold world 
Its a warm place 
Where you know that you’re supposed to be
A million moments 
Full of sweet relief
When the right one comes along

Every single broken heart
Will lead you to the truth
You think you know what you’re looking for 
Til what you’re looking for finds you

It’s so easy 
Nothing to it
Though you may not believe me now
But i promise 
Honey you’ll find out 
When the right one comes along

All that changes 
Is only everything
When the right comes along

Simple as it should be

Had a wonderful and spontaneous afternoon today. After lunch I was so restless and bored with whatever I was studying I was taking a little nap and Odelia texted me, cubicles away asking if we should just go watch a movie instead. And so we skipped studying and rushed to downtown east to watch the movie and walked in seconds before it started. To top things off, the movie is perfect. Love, family, living. It's just so packed with reminders of what I've already known and must keep in mind. 

Thank you for gifting me a wonderful day odelia! 

Only god knows the future

Feeling exceptionally thankful tonight. I survived project meetings and lab and did most of my assignment tomorrow before my dinner with ode and Shiu Heng. Ode and I were sitting at ramen play and I was asking her about her day and she was telling me about it and watching her tell me about her day and having someone share how they felt at the end of the day is just very.... Right. Like home. Like a comfort that doesn't slip from your hands and walk out of your life. Then it was me telling Shiu Heng about some silly stories and him listening and Odelia filling in at times. I realize how with some people things unfold very easily. Like how the poem strings all the words effortlessly and create feelings and meaning and everything just fits. I like how life fits despite the horrible school work and how sometimes I listen to people talk about themselves and what they say and what they meant and I know what is important to them and knowing that makes me certain of who they are and what I can offer to them, what friend I can be. You can't give coins to a broken hearted man. 

Everyday I go home with some dishes left for me in case I get hungry, my bed made and the curtains drawn and my clothes freshly ironed and having my parents and mama and Amanda ask me how my day went and my schedule for tomorrow. I feel overwhelmed with warmth and a knowledge that I can look forward with people I love behind my back. 

Thank you. 

Y

Let me tell you this: I imagined this scenario a million times over my head. What I would say when I see you for who you are, how you are and what you meant to me. Meant to me;Meant to be with me. I would tell you how inside me I would burst in tears thanking god as profusely as I could for his grace in showing me that love is standing right in front of me. His hands, held open, his lips, with faith and truth. I would tell you about the nights I cried in silence, the tears in your absence. I would tell you how you collected them in a jar and drank it all so I wouldn't be reminded of it, so we would share the pain such that it's not longer pain but something we share. 

We. I would tell you how I forgot I. How my life now I see, would be we, us. How we would walk through the storm together, walk through the fire unscathed because of us, of we, of what we have is nothing anything or anybody can take away from us.