She wanted more than he could give

I've been lacking sleep these days. My mood is constantly affected by things that I don't deem important enough.

I like to enjoy time apart from people I'm being increasingly close to. It helps me tell If I can do without them. But i'm pretty sure this time. I know I can do without you and I like that. I hate our conversations. I hate having to explain what I mean, hate having to explain my point of view when all you can and should do is accept it. I hate having to share your problems because they make you tiresome, I hate how I feel things are getting less important to you while it's growing on me. I hate how I have to reply you because I will, I hate obligation, hate the way you phrase your words, hate how your problems rubs off on me, hate how you really really don't understand or know me, hate how you say extend when it should be extent. I hate how I can no longer tell you stuff or enjoy telling you stuff. I hate how you make me compare, make me wait and wait and wait and expect and expect and expect while you constantly disappoint me. I hate how you want me to give when I don't think you've given a whole lot. Well basically I hate a whole lot about you.

So I'm glad we have distance and space. I will grow back into my old routine, where you'll only be on a couple of times until one day you'll slowly leave and new people comes in and they leave and life goes on.

I am going to enjoy myself at admission day tomorrow. Make friends, make a whole fucking lot of friends because you think I don't make friends when I told you I have enough friends and strangers make me uncomfortable in a way you'd never understand. I don't think you ever get how I've repeatedly told you how my friends are enough, more than enough, more than I need and deserve because i think you always brush what i say off. So yes. I hope you eat on your words soon and just freaking agree with me next time because you never make sense, or I'm just stubborn.

I don't know why I'm irritated. It's like I'm quarreling with myself. And yes, I hate how I can never quarrel with you and end up being upset and quarreling with myself. I'm just so fucking tired of what you do to me so I'm done with this. Better off without you anyway.