Was exhausted cos I stayed up to talk to shi and watched before sunrise after talking to shi because I figured I'd watch part 1 then and part 2 the next day while on my way to the cinema with Odelia so we would at least have an inkling of what'sc going on before watching the 3rd part, Before midnight. Things was good though Odelia was adorably nervous but things picked up during lunch and I guess food bring people together. It was okay, but I swear I hate it when I get the vibe that people find me immature and overreacting. I am not. I swear, I'm all I can be and I mean like what, you expect me to be like 50 years old in thoughts? Not near fucking possible. I felt so agitated when ode told me about her accident cos it honesty could have killed her or her family and how was my reaction too overly dramatized? Ok fine, I may have been slightly agitated but people should understand where I'm coming from right? I mean my friend or her family could have been seriously injured and how would you feel if that's what happened to people you care about? I was just annoyed but I figured I'm so damn pissed about these irresponsible people in society. How could they still exist in a arguably civilized society like singapore? Honestly, what kind of person would ever say or do something like that?
It's okay I'm calming down now after speed walking to dte and to the pool from the bus stop. It's ok I need to chill. I'm so exhausted now. After my korea trip I feel so on edge. I was okay before that. I was chill and I didn't had too much emotions and feelings. Now I get nervous and anxious easily. I hate how I would drive my nails into my palm to remind myself that it's ok, that I need to breathe that it's just a small matter. Everything could be a small matter. I don't have to worry. I hate it. Can I just be at peace now. I feel so much like swimming but.... I don't know. A cold shower will do. Relax. Please relax jocelyn.
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